I remember the fear though. It has never really left me. At first, after I got out, I was afraid of my own shadow. I was afraid to walk out my front door, into the light, into the dark. It lived inside me, gripped my insides like a steel vise, wouldn't let go. It thrived. And it had power over me.
But somewhere in the dark recesses of my soul was a single spark, a pinprick of light. I needed it, craved it. It called to me. I began to dig for it, using every ounce of strength I had. When the fear threatened to twist me into a heapless, shapeless nothing, I clawed my way toward that light. My soul was battered, as my body had been, but the light was in me. And it grew. It grew inside me as I tossed out chunks of darkness. I threw them aside because now, I was angry. Mad and enraged. I wanted my life back. I deserved it. Those other young souls deserved it. I made the decision....
I would be free. I would rise out of the ashes."
This is an exerpt of a book I had started many years ago. It's not necessarily about my life, although I used my own experiences to guide my writing. It's about a fictional character that represents the thousands of women (and children) throughout the world who are abused, neglected, and forgotten.
For the most part I try to keep my blog upbeat and cheery and occassionally witty, but I do have another side to me. A deeper side that wants or needs to be heard. Not heard for selfish reasons, but heard for those who need to be heard and not forgotten about - those who are less fortunate than us.
Many times this issue is swept under the rug and these women and children who are living in or trying to escape from an abusive relationship are pushed to the recesses of our conscious thought. Not on purpose, but because many of us don't live this kind of life, with this kind of fear and hurt. Being one who has experienced this myself (not with my current husband) I have a special place in my heart for these people. I know what it feels like to be in an abusive marriage. The fear, the worry, the stress.
Domestic Violence is a serious issue. We need to be reminded of this and that it happens everyday - to your friends, your family, your neighbors, and co-workers. And there are things that can be done - things that should be done! Here are a few to help you help others.
National Domestic Violence Hotline 1- 800-799-SAFE
Domestic Abuse Links
Here's my challenge to you: Contact your local battered women's shelter. Agree to meet at a general location the director or another representative from the shelter to deliver some holiday cheer to these women and children (baked goods, toys for the kids, christmas cards, etc). They will be happy to receive the donation on behalf of the women and children in the shelter.
Let's not forget about them this holiday season!